12 quick reasons why superannuation is like marriage!


Beam me up if I’m wrong here, but most people still believe in marriage, as well as superannuation. While both provide unbelievable benefits, unfortunately, there’s also the dark side that can lead to some ugly D words: Divorce and (here’s where super comes in) Despair… for your future.

However, perhaps if we lift the lid, or sheets, ever so gently on these two subjects, we can see how they correlate… and have an amazing synergy that, perhaps, we can learn from?

1. Elvis or Gomer?
Yeah, you’ve been dating for a few years, checking out the talent. And then one day, BOOM, you meet Mr/Mrs Right. Your life’s quest has now been satiated. All the boxes are ticked. Everything makes so much sense. And you’re thinking, if I don’t sign this up I might miss out.

Whether it is a partner for the rest of your life, or a financial arrangement that will support you to the end of your life, you move forward and make a commitment – confident of a rewarding future.

With rose coloured glasses, you now start the journey of discovering, was it Marilyn Monroe or Phyllis Diller you actually married? The same predicament presents for the aspiring super funds you explore. They all have great attractions, but what will they look like in the future?

2. For better or worse…
As the honeymoon continues, both in marriage and with your super fund, you are beaming with new life. Your many experiences of tyre kicking have paid off – and you bathe in the knowledge that your future is anchored on a rock solid foundation. Both emotionally and financially, you are headed for a fantastic future.

3. Does my ego look big in this?
You even find yourself quite keen to show off your trophy wife/stud husband to your dinner party friends and work colleagues. In a similar fashion, no barbeque get-together is too sacred not to talk about your latest super returns and, by the way… how did your fund perform compared to mine?

4. Hey, what’s that?
Hmmm, in time you start to notice things that simply weren’t there before. Your better half appears to be doing things that just don’t make sense, and there’re moments when they can be quite annoying. At the same time, why is your super not performing as it should be?

5. Cybill had how many personalities?
To your delight, and at times annoyance, your other half can be stunningly sensational and light up your universe with complete fulfillment… and at other times they’re just not there in the room. Funny how your Super can deliver amazing returns one year, and then the next time you check it’s a shy underperforming hollow thing in a dark corner.

6. Seconds anyone?
As time goes on, you two start to do what most couples do… put on weight. Not too dissimilar to your super – you hope.

7. The hassle-in-laws
With marriage come the in-laws. As they start to make themselves known, you find that some are easy to deal with. The others remind you of your super fund – in that, they too start to contact you with issues… be that insurance offers, or other financial options. These, just like relatives, will now be forever in your life.

8. Ka-ching
As either of you progress in your careers, so does your income and the what-part-of-Europe-can-we-now-holiday-in pay packet. At about the same time, your compounding super starts to deliver impressive statements.

9. Where’s the remote?
Inevitably, there’s nothing as unpredictable as the economy. Which can result in one or both of you lying around the sofa all week, wondering what Oprah is doing? Again, much like super in a bear market.

10. Patience is a virtue?
Marriage, at times, can be just as eventful as an election rally for Donald Trump. Whether you succumb to the consuming statistics of divorce, or stay the true and narrow path of marriage, will be determined, to a large degree, with how you ignore the temptations that arise. Staying true to your superannuation fund will also be a test of endurance.

11. A team effort
At last, it’s time to grab that golden iWatch and retire with your beloved. You’ve both (or the four of you, including your super funds) weathered the ‘what-ifs’ of life, and can now enjoy the fruits of your lifelong toil.

12. Let the good times roll
About now, you should find a soft chair in the shade and have a good long think. Statistically, you’re one of the few to make it to God’s waiting room with someone you love, and have the financial freedom to enjoy it. Whether you’ve spent your life with Marilyn, Phyllis, Elvis or Gomer, their support, as well as that from a quality super fund, gave you a great life. And if anyone is offered the same life opportunity, they would quickly say: “I do”.